R. Kelly still trapped in closet; Adam Lambert released from jail

Two singers and tabloid favorites are producing news in the area of involuntary confinement.

The R&ampB lothario R. Kelly, fresh off announcing his exquisitely titled memoir, “Soula Coaster,” and a concert cruise in October (woe that David Foster Wallace is not about to compose about that a single), has made the decision to revisit his ongoing serialized pop-opera “Trapped in the Closet.” Kelly told TMZ he’s written 32 new chapters in the Byzantine murder-adultery-utter-insanity saga, but is searching for investors just before production, due to the fact “it charges a lot of dollars to do.” This is clear proof of a crisis in public arts funding in America.

Meanwhile, an ocean away but in no significantly less dramatic style, “American Idol” favored Adam Lambert was briefly detained in a Finnish jail right after a brawl with his boyfriend Sauli Koskinen (a star of Finland’s edition of “Massive Brother”) spilled out of a Helsinki bar and into a crowd of bystanders. Each were detained, questioned and released, and neither suffered notable injury, however a mutual good friend and former Miss Helsinki, Sofia Ruusila, was reportedly accidentally struck trying to separate them. Lambert explained it thusly on Twitter: “Jetlag+Vodka=blackout. Us÷blackout=irrational confusion. jail+guilt+press=lesson learned. Sauli+Adam+hangover burgers= laughing bout it.”


Adam Lambert arrested in bar battle

R. Kelly has emergency throat surgery

Live evaluation: R. Kelly at the Nokia Theatre 

— August Brown

Photo: Sauli Koskinen, left, and singer Adam Lambert outside the Nokia Theatre in Los Angeles soon after arriving for “American Idol” Season 10’s finale benefits show on May 25. Credit: Frazer Harrison / Getty Images

Pop &amp Hiss